Mummy at the School Gate

When I was a kid I would be found either plucking all the petals from my Ma's prized roses or breaking off huge swathes of blossom from the most fragrant bushes I could find and mixing them with pond water in an attempt to preserve and bottle their scent. I would crush the dandelions and buttercups into pastes and mix them with flour and pummel the fallen apples from the trees to make apple juice.  As I grew older my Nan would share her tips with me, and as she was from an era of austerity, her "make do" regime stood her in good stead.  Even in her eighties her skin was creamy, with very few lines and she swore by her natural remedies. Sorting through my old notebooks and papers from days gone by I found some old skincare recipes that I had collected. The plan was to collate them into some kind of book.  Well, they've been sitting there for donkeys and I still haven't shared them and I think it's time that they saw the light of day. Most of the thing you

Hmmm... These boxes held two beautiful handmade Easter eggs....the boxes look empty....take a closer look...the bleedin' chocolate melted!

That Samantha Brick is a girl, isn't she?  I don't mean girl as in "girl" (but you know that, don't you?) but as in a girl who likes to stir up controversy. She's got the whole of the nation gabbing about her bit in the Daily Wail;  her follow up piece clearly written in haste (not!) and I wonder why the nation can't see that this has probably been one great, big PR stunt?  The Daily Wail had warned of the backlash (mentioned on This Morning), yet it wasn't tempered to suit the readership but to ensure that a campaign followed that would ensure her theory was proven correct and her profile elevated. And....reading between the lines I know it was more to provoke a reaction...the girl ain't that stupid....surely? In another of her pieces she's spoken of her agony of acne and how it's blighted her life and lost her a chance at success, so it strikes me as a bit odd that her current popularity (or unpopularity) is concerned with why women d

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I really don't think I could even compete in the tidy stakes, but what I do love is a gadget.  I'm not sure how to use them all, but I'm certain most of the time that they come in pretty handy for something, sometime..if I could find them.  I'll jump on the bandwagon the moment I see a new toy.  I'll play with it for a while; create some masterpiece then lose it somewhere in the depths of the homestead. At the moment my lifesaver has got to be the vacuum cleaner... and an air freshener!   Vacuum up the dog hair, the bits of food, and the Lego blocks lying around...squirt the air freshener..then hey presto...smells as clean as a whistle....shame about the clothes lying all over the floor!  Those, I just kick aside or hoover around them! I've heard that having a de-clutter is the way to go! De-clutter?  I need every last gadget I have! So, my tips for a clean and sparkling homestead: Don't wash the windows on a sunny day. Iron when you're angry...I

He's only, bleeding well done it again!!  PeeWee...I mean.  He's eaten his bed, yet again!  You'd think that now he's grown (in dog years, I'm guessing he's about 10), he'd have come to terms with what he can and can't chew, but this is now getting ridiculous.  I'm loathe to chuck all the beds out as poor old Chubba would have to sleep on the cold hard floors and the poor old boy has difficulty enough raising himself from the floor as it is. Poor old Chubba shouldn't have to suffer because Pee Wee is a sh*te!! He's chewed his plastic bed to buggery and his "bruva from anuva muva's" bed, but that's old news.  PeeWee's Bed I'd hoped that he'd have gotten over it by now.  It's not as if he doesn't get enough romps in the park...he does and if he doesn't he soon tells me all about it! Apart from taking his lovely gnashers out, I'm not sure there is a thing I can do about it.  It's no use t

Daisy phoned me the other day.  She couldn't make our walk as her 22 year old son had been "beaten up" the night before and she had to take him to the dentist that morning.  She didn't go into much detail at the time as she was in a hurry.  The story came later. Sam had visited a petrol station the night before. He and a couple of his friends had stopped off after a night out to get try and find something to eat.  Outside, were two girls who had also stopped off to stock up on chocolate and the boys stayed and chatted while they ate their sandwiches.   While they were chatting a car pulled into the forecourt and two young men got out. "GET IN THE CAR!" the first male shouted at the girls. The girls said no. They said no, because they didn't know the two men. "GET IN THE EFFING CAR, YOU BITCHES !" he shouted again. Further abuse followed.  The boys had no idea what was going on.  The men from the car were shouting and made to grab the