Mummy at the School Gate

I really don't think I could even compete in the tidy stakes, but what I do love is a gadget.  I'm not sure how to use them all, but I'm certain most of the time that they come in pretty handy for something, sometime..if I could find them.  I'll jump on the bandwagon the moment I see a new toy.  I'll play with it for a while; create some masterpiece then lose it somewhere in the depths of the homestead. At the moment my lifesaver has got to be the vacuum cleaner... and an air freshener!   Vacuum up the dog hair, the bits of food, and the Lego blocks lying around...squirt the air freshener..then hey presto...smells as clean as a whistle....shame about the clothes lying all over the floor!  Those, I just kick aside or hoover around them! I've heard that having a de-clutter is the way to go! De-clutter?  I need every last gadget I have! So, my tips for a clean and sparkling homestead: Don't wash the windows on a sunny day. Iron when you're angry...I

He's only, bleeding well done it again!!  PeeWee...I mean.  He's eaten his bed, yet again!  You'd think that now he's grown (in dog years, I'm guessing he's about 10), he'd have come to terms with what he can and can't chew, but this is now getting ridiculous.  I'm loathe to chuck all the beds out as poor old Chubba would have to sleep on the cold hard floors and the poor old boy has difficulty enough raising himself from the floor as it is. Poor old Chubba shouldn't have to suffer because Pee Wee is a sh*te!! He's chewed his plastic bed to buggery and his "bruva from anuva muva's" bed, but that's old news.  PeeWee's Bed I'd hoped that he'd have gotten over it by now.  It's not as if he doesn't get enough romps in the park...he does and if he doesn't he soon tells me all about it! Apart from taking his lovely gnashers out, I'm not sure there is a thing I can do about it.  It's no use t

Daisy phoned me the other day.  She couldn't make our walk as her 22 year old son had been "beaten up" the night before and she had to take him to the dentist that morning.  She didn't go into much detail at the time as she was in a hurry.  The story came later. Sam had visited a petrol station the night before. He and a couple of his friends had stopped off after a night out to get try and find something to eat.  Outside, were two girls who had also stopped off to stock up on chocolate and the boys stayed and chatted while they ate their sandwiches.   While they were chatting a car pulled into the forecourt and two young men got out. "GET IN THE CAR!" the first male shouted at the girls. The girls said no. They said no, because they didn't know the two men. "GET IN THE EFFING CAR, YOU BITCHES !" he shouted again. Further abuse followed.  The boys had no idea what was going on.  The men from the car were shouting and made to grab the

...quite often I'm called by other names. My Dad runs through the whole list of family names before he remembers mine.  Sometimes I think he just can't be bothered to look at me and work out who I am.  I shouldn't be offended but when he calls me by the dogs names I can't but help be a little irritated.  Sometimes I jump in before he reaches the third name and proffer my own...spoils the fun of watching him struggle, but hey...I always remember his!  BH, doesn't always call me by name and often substitutes it with "Babe" or "You bitch".  I've been called worse. A naughty Girl! On Parents Day, (many moons ago, in those halcyon days of the past, when the sun always shone and you had time to smell the sweetness of the hedgerow...) off my parents trotted to hear what evils I had done throughout my year, and they were never disappointed.  In those days we were left at home so that the teachers could talk frankly about our behaviour and

I'd always thought I was a popular soul, but now and again I get the feeling that sometimes people uncomfortable in my company.  It's happened on a couple of occasions  and all I want to do is hide in a hole.  I've placed myself into he vulnerable position of being in their company, and they just turn away and talk to someone else!!  Sheeeet!!  I'm not that odd or boring but when it happens find myself at a loss at what to say and just stand there hoping that something will pop into my head...and the more I feel uncomfortable the more I see the discomfort in their faces...not a pleasant situation to be in from where I'm standing. The other evening BH and I went out for dinner with the family of BB's (beautiful Ben) girlfriend.  She's wanted us to meet them (as she loves us so!) and to thank us for putting up with them over the past year!  Girlfriend "kind of" moved in with BB and us all, making it a very jolly and noisy homestead.  Lots of screa

Breath in....breath out...breath in....heave a sigh of relief.  Christmas is over and I actually got through it without crying, throwing a tantrum or throwing the kids out!   I wish I could say it was peaceful and magical...but it wasn't.  It was one continuous food fest from Christmas Eve until just 10 minutes ago, when I stuffed the last mince pie down BH's throat, even though he was protesting he couldn't eat another thing.  The thought that I might wake in the night and creep down and eat it was all that was playing on my mind. No more bleedin' mince pies! Yee haww! The house is a bit empty now that Sis and her family (with BB and Girlfriend), Ma and Pa, Bro and partner have all departed to their various homesteads, but I'm glad they've gone. I've loved having them, but I love having my home back. The kids have been excellent.  They behaved better than the adults.   Sis's husband got seriously annoyed with us as we refused to play to the rules of s

Christmas is almost upon us and it's usually around this time I begin to remember those who are no longer in my life.  The special ones who are no longer with us, and the ones that made a quick departure. 2010 began pretty badly and marked the start of my blog, mainly I guess, as a way to take my mind off the things that were truly haunting me. I've been through some very sad  times in the past but had always believed that I was "blessed" or lucky. I had a loving and generous family, I had health, and I had my wonderful life but this was...bammmm and I was at the centre of it all. They say bad luck comes in threes and you've guessed it... so did mine 1. I fell out with my nephew 2. I almost lost my job 3. I lost a very close friend They came almost suddenly, one upon the other. Although almost losing my job came close to causing me to lose my sanity,  falling out with my nephew was and is the one thing I regret and the one thing I mourn. I have absolutely